Visiting Glasgow: The Greatness of Glasgow

“For whatever failings we have as a species, I’m grateful we can remain the origin of our own arts.” -Old Sean

Road Hygine

I have a rule for traveling and life in general: The more homeless a person is, the less homeless they should try to look.

Since I don’t have a home, permanent residence or even a mailing address, I make a point of wearing collared shirts and long chinos while traveling. I also keep my beard nicely trimmed and my face scrubbed clean.

That being said, I’m very close to needing a haircut. I’m a tattered jacket and two missed shaves away from being asked not to sleep on public benches while walking through train stations.

Visiting Glasgow

After my time in Edinburgh, I’m now visiting Glasgow at a rather inopportune moment.

Right now, the TRNSMT Festival is actively soaking up the majority of lodging oppertunities in the city. As such, I haven’t been able to find a hostel or cheap hotel in Glasgow. instead, I’m staying somewhat outside the city and regularily wandering back in.

It’s still pleasant joining the festivities on the streets and chatting up scantily-clad women in copious amounts of glitter.  I just wish my stay was slightly less expensive.

A Kinetic Theater

Despite a tricky lodging situation, I was never disappointed with my time visiting Glasgow.  I had to carry my luggage for a while, but I still managed to stop by quite a few Glasgow features

The most notable of these features was The Sharmanka Kinetic Theatre, which frankly deserves a post of its own.

The Kinetic Sculptures of the Theatre were primarily crafted by Eduard Bersudsky in an 18-square-meter communal flat in Leningrad during the 1970’s and 80’s. 

His creations were damned from exhibitions as stylistically unacceptable according to the Soviet authority point of view. The sculptures were considered both ideologically and aesthetically incorrect. 

These sculptures were crafted from remnants of carved furniture, wheels from Singer sewing machines and actual recovered animal bones. The kinetic features were powered by old motors stolen from factories by friends or gathered from the black market in exchange for bottles of vodka.

Bersudsky carved the figures, painted them and dried them using the huge gas boiler he operated to support his livelihood. 

Uninfluenced by the churning arts of the modern world and unable to display his creations, Bersudsky sculpted in a state of cultural isolation, granting a heartfelt and outlandish flavor in every winch, gear and spark.

(The information above was obtained from Sharmanka Kinetic Theatre Kinetic Sculptures by Eduard Bersudsky entry pamphlet. I also wrote down supplementary information from the audio introduction prior to the show.  Nothing written here was a direct quote).

Into the Show

Upon arrival, I crept into a low-ceilinged, dusky room which houses some of the oddest art displays I’ve ever seen. 

Mechanical creatures and features, speckled with tiny, clairvoyant bells and irregular symmetry are looped with belts, chains and hanging gears. These are operated by small wooden figures clutching ropes and levers. 

The artwork is initially interesting to see on arrival and there’s a gritty sense of surrealism which taps into the corners of a mind. There’s a fair amount of outlandish sensations as well, as visitors gaze at white animal skulls melded into metal and wood.

And for a moment, the mind can grasp what it’s seeing, until the show begins. 

The lights dim (Light Design by Sergey Jakovsky) and music tingles forth (Music by Alexander Knaifel, Sountrack by Olga Tzechnovitzer and Leonid Levin) and all semblance of solid comprehension is shuttered away as figures come to life.

Entire sculptures sputter, putter, spiral, bow and jangle with miniature bells.  The music cuts and builds and walks and stumbles coming in something disjointed enough to slam away bits of logic like a chisel on wood. Finally, the fully astounding performance imprints itself upon an unprepared mind.

Direct Quotes of Kinetic Theater

For all I’ve written, I’ve explained it poorly.  Quotes, perhaps, shed a sliver more of light upon the experience.

“We grew up in a dumb country – Bells were forbidden under the Communist regime.  Most of them had been thrown down from the belfry and sent to the foundry.  The few that were left were only allowed to be run on rare occasions, such as important church festivals – and then only muffled.  Maybe this is why there are so many bells in Eduard’s kinemats” (Page 2, Sharmanka Kinetic Theatre information pamphlet.  Direct Quote.)

“One of my first childhood memories is of our communal kitchen, full of smoke from the oil stove where someone was cooking, a neighbor rubbing kerosene into her daughter’s hair to kill lice, other engaged in all sorts of chores.  I found a box with ventilation holes, stuck noses onto walnut shells, pushed my fingers through the holes and put the shells on my fingers.  By moving them I could create the illusion of people having a lively conversation.  I must have been about eight years old.  Now, more than 60 years have passed and I am still playing with my theatre.” (Eduard Berudsky, Opening Page Sharmanka Kinetic Theatre information pamphlet.  Direct Quote.)

Elsewhere in Glasgow

Once I departed the Sharmanka Kinetic Theatre, I wandered east in a mild stupor, planning on peering at the Necropolis that Glasgow is so famed for. 

I had already missed the closing time, so I was delighted to find the enormous city-cemetery gates of The Necropolis still open. 

I spent the next hour exploring a veritable town of headstones overlooking the sunset before finally running a last pair of errands and reaching the very pleasant Bruce Hotel in East Kilbride for the night.

A Full Tour of Glasgow

I actually got to see quite a bit of Glasgow in my rather limited time. 

The Duke of Wellington Statue, humorously given a traffic-cone hat that’s become a permanent feature has evolved significantly. There are now twelve orange cones atop the Duke’s head and one transforming his statue-steed into a unicorn. 

George Square was enjoyable enough to check out with it’s numerous monuments and governing buildings.

Though difficult to reach, Pollok Country Park is a beautiful zone full of old estate buildings, surprisingly peaceful trails and Highland cattle supporting impressive hairdos.

A little time spent in Glasgow’s Climbing Centre was a fine way to blow off steam and the café upstairs was extremely accommodating. 

The Riverside Museum of Transport was much more impressive than I was initially expecting, including the alleged “first” pedal-powered bicycle. 

And of course, the Kelvingrove Art Gallery and Museum is a stupendous way to spend a few hours. After visiting Kelvingrove, I wandered back to the city center for dinner

That was all my time for visiting Glasgow. My hotel was too far away to return and collect my backpack, so I ended up carrying it around throughout the day.

Fairly tired, I settled down to catch my train to Liverpool, unable to afford a second night in the city.

While I was supposed to spend considerably more time in town, I was happy to enjoy what time I had.

For now, Liverpool awaits.

So until then,

Best regards and excellent trails,

Old Sean

Written July 2nd, 2018

Images While Visiting Edinburgh

Want to read more about visiting Glasgow? Check out the Leftfade Trails Destination Info Page

Affiliate Disclosure: Leftfade Trails contains affiliate links, so using services or products through these links supports the website, at no extra cost to the user. All links are to tested services and products designed to aid travelers on their journeys. Some links specifically connect to Amazon. As an Amazon Associate this website earns from qualifying purchases.